Memory
October 19, 2007
When I took Psych 101 in college, my teacher asked us to try and recall the earliest memory of our childhood and write it down. Everyone came in with papers of around the ages of 3-5 being their earliest memory. She then went on to tell us that our memories are not always accurate; even though we think we know where we were even when a detrimental event such as Pearl Harbor occurred, that it is just our mind playing tricks on us. A year later the Twin Towers were hit.
I remember exactly what I was doing, what I did that day, and how I reacted to the event. I remember it as clear as yesterday, but yet I should not trust my memory? Why? What proof do you actually have that my memory is not my memory? That it is not accurate? How can we make such a statement in Psychology?
I was abused when I was younger. My sister too. But we both have different memories of our childhood. She insists it was not as bad as I claim and that some of my claims are false (claims that we had all made growing up and proven, but now as adults she disavows). It hurts that my flesh and blood chooses our adopted parents over me, but she has the need for a family that I long ago buried. My friends have become my family. It is often said that there are some friends that are closer than a brother so why not? I love my sister dearly and would do anything for her and her kids, do not get me wrong on that, but I just cannot see why we can’t have what we had as kids. We were not close knit, but we had each other’s backs above all else.
It took me a little while in my younger years to get over the abuse and the rejection of my adopted family (more specifically my mother), but I did. I do not hold a grudge on anyone (I can forgive, but I do refuse to forget because I do believe in the old adage that those who do not remember their past are doomed to repeat it), but I do refuse to let them back in my life. Such would be stupid on my part and to my detriment. I love my sister and will always let her in, but that family I will not.
Memories. Good or bad, how is it that we all seem to have different recollections of the same even?
Tags: abused, family, friends, Memories
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